The Role that Stress Plays in Success

 

An apple tree was once beautiful and well taken care of. It would not produce fruit. The woman who owned this tree tried everything that she could think of to help this tree to produce sweet fruit. She fertilized it, pruned it, and appropriately watered it. No fruit came. She asked a man with an orchard full of apple trees what she should do. He said that she needed to get a large stick or bat and beat the tree. She was surprised and was sure that it would not work. She was desperate. Furthermore, she got a bat and beat the tree repeatedly. The tree produced juicy red apples.

This story can be applied to our own lives. We may try everything to make our lives better and easier. We don't have children or get married because that would bring stress. Furthermore, we find jobs that have little to no stress. All we do to have a life that we enjoy purposefully avoids heartache and pressure. What we really need to find joy or produce delicious fruit is to have trials and stressors. We need to be under pressure to grow. Think about the most difficult trial you have experienced. How did it change you? The most difficult things in life are what bring the most growth.

I have experienced this myself. My sister and I have never been able to understand each other. We are different in every way. My sister has frequent panic attacks and almost constant anxiety. I always thought that it was all in her head. Her victim mentality is what was causing her so much anxiety. My perspective changed during my senior year in high school. I went to color guard practice around six in the evening. I felt a strange tingling throughout my body and even on my tongue. This feeling was alien to me. As my teammates and I ran through the choreography for our performance, the feeling became more intense and overwhelming. I started to cry. My coach took me on a walk through the school halls, as she does with all the teammates who are struggling. She told me that my breathing was shallow and irregular. She said that I was having a panic attack.

I did not believe her. I thought to myself that panic attacks are what my sister had, not me. Soon after that walk with my coach, my breathing was rapid and uncontrollable. I felt like I was possessed. I had no idea how to deal with a panic attack, I had no control over my body. So little oxygen was coming in that my body was literally paralyzed. I could not move my upper body. My dad eventually came to pick me up. I could hardly walk. He had to carry me to the car.

Through this trial, or torture as I saw it, I gained an immense amount of understanding for my sister. I knew that it was not all in her head. I knew how she had suffered. Before, I didn't even have sympathy for her. After experiencing a panic attack for myself, I had empathy for my sister. I became much closer to her. This strengthened relationship would not have happened if I had not been metaphorically beaten like that apple tree. The greatest things in life only come through stress.

Stress is a good thing, but it can become hazardous when there is too much for a long period of time. Families who experience intense and drawn-out stress need a supportive community. They require people who will take action and lift them when they cannot stand. When others around us are experiencing a major stressor, we should not stand idly by saying that it's too bad as we go about our day. We need to put ourselves in their shoes and recognize that this is serious and real. The best thing we can do is listen.